Thursday, September 24, 2009

Triolet Thursday - Triolet #7

What is a triolet? Check the [corny] video I made on the original post if you need some explanation.


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Triolet #7 (National Book Festival 2009)

My excitement is climbing a wall
sweating authors like condensation.
If Woodson talks to me, I will fall
my excitement is climbing a wall.
I’m heading to the National Mall.
Writers in person? Sweet temptation!
My excitement is climbing a wall,
sweating authors like condensation.

7 comments:

Keith Wilson said...

I was wondering if that was you in the video. A quick question:

Do you follow the meter of a triolet? That's what's stopping me from doing it, because I'm not completely sure I've ever understood it, really.

I like this one a lot, the "I'm heading to the National Mall" is my favorite line. I'm not exactly sure why, but it has something to do with your decision to use heading instead of walking or leaving.

I hate it when I have a feeling, but can't pin point why that feeling is true for me. It's how I write, mostly, maybe how everyone writes. You have a feeling this is how it should be phrased. Maybe later you decide that it works because of this, or that. But at first, at least for me, it's just a feeling.

Vizionheiry said...

Ok kudos to you for the complex rhyme of condensation and temptation. Did you know the triolet is considered one of the most difficult forms because the differening rhyme schemes? Anyway you continue to practice this. Still searching for my expert form. I think I'll take a weekend off of social media to finish that triolet I started!

Saw the vid too! Quick but effective. Reminds me of 12 second videos.

evelyn.n.alfred said...

Keith: I didn't use iambic tetrameter or iambic pentameter on this triolet, but I do make an attempt to use it on the other ones. I can't honestly say that I understand meter that much so I count the syllables because I don't know where the stress is on words. I figure the stress depends on the person reading it. LOL! I really wanted to use the condensation and that ate up four syllables so it made it difficult to fit other words in.

evelyn.n.alfred said...

Vizion: I had no idea it was considered difficult. I just love the sing songy-ness of it and that there are rules to follow.

Maybe you could become an expert at tankas or villanelles?

Aleksis said...

As far as meter, this is interesting. It's true pronunciation differs from one person to another, and some words are stressed depending on what words are around them. I scanned mostly anapests here. I hope these line up, but each mark is a syllable so it shouldn't be too hard to see:

. . / . . / . . /
My excitement is climbing a wall

/ . / . . / . / .
sweating authors like condensation.

. / . / . / . . /
If Woodson talks to me, I will fall

. / . . . / . . /
I’m heading to the National Mall.
/ .(/) . / . / . / .
Writers in person? Sweet temptation!

I think anapests work fine even if that isn't the tradition.

evelyn.n.alfred said...

Anapests...? I guess I need to do some research. *smile*

Vizionheiry said...

If all the people on Twitter can write haikus that are not about nature, why should we abide by the meter rule?

The structure is difficult enough without getting into meter.

@Keith, I say start with structure, then add meter as you go on.

*prays to Nina Simone that Evelyn will get Intensedebate or Disqus comment system & remove moderation*